#i just copied this over from two different posts but hopefully it's coherent enough

[vickyvicarious]

It looks to me like Jack began feeling distanced from Lucy even before he looked at her tomb to find her (unbeknownst to him) as a vampire. His descriptions of her were kinda getting cold and clinical while she was dying and becoming halfway through vampiric...

Yes, I agre there's a bit of a pattern there! I actually collected a bunch of moments of it happening earlier, but they're together with a very spoilery post. Here, I'll copy/paste the Lucy ones below for people who don't want the spoilers.

There on the bed, seemingly in a swoon, lay poor Lucy, more horribly white and wan-looking than ever. Even the lips were white, and the gums seemed to have shrunken back from the teeth, as we sometimes see in a corpse after a prolonged illness. Van Helsing raised his foot to stamp in anger, but the instinct of his life and all the long years of habit stood to him, and he put it down again softly. “Quick!” he said. “Bring the brandy.” I flew to the dining-room, and returned with the decanter. He wetted the poor white lips with it, and together we rubbed palm and wrist and heart. He felt her heart, and after a few moments of agonising suspense said:— “It is not too late.”

I find Jack’s sudden detachment in this scene so interesting. I think he might have done this before to an extent, describing physical symptoms almost as a separate phenomenon rather than a part of the person. He certainly spoke of Lucy rather formally in some medical contexts (“Patient improved” etc.). But it’s especially striking here how quickly he goes from humanizing language to speaking about her almost as an object. It happens right when he describes her lips and teeth - which holds a lot of significance vampirically.

Jack obviously isn’t looking at Lucy thinking she’s a vampire. But he outright says that the look of her teeth/gums reminds him of a corpse. She looks dead. And seeing that, he describes her more clinically, seeking to distance himself emotionally from the sight. He can’t completely do it (that’s how we get “the poor white lips”, still sympathetic) but it’s not until he gets to Lucy’s heart - and how it is still beating - that he returns to saying “her”.

I found several more instances of this happening with Lucy as well, including what seems like a trend almost of Jack starting to key in to her more vampiric moments over time.

On 18 September, only briefly:

Whilst asleep she looked stronger, although more haggard, and her breathing was softer; her open mouth showed the pale gums drawn back from the teeth, which thus looked positively longer and sharper than usual; when she woke the softness of her eyes evidently changed the expression, for she looked her own self, although a dying one.

Then as she is dying on the 20th it happens more, and specifically in multiple instances when she was more vampiric:

Lucy was breathing somewhat stertorously, and her face was at its worst, for the open mouth showed the pale gums. Her teeth, in the dim, uncertain light, seemed longer and sharper than they had been in the morning. In particular, by some trick of the light, the canine teeth looked longer and sharper than the rest. I sat down by her, and presently she moved uneasily. […] And then insensibly there came the strange change which I had noticed in the night. Her breathing grew stertorous, the mouth opened, and the pale gums, drawn back, made the teeth look longer and sharper than ever. […] I kept my eyes fixed on Lucy, as did Van Helsing, and we saw a spasm as of rage flit like a shadow over her face; the sharp teeth champed together. Then her eyes closed, and she breathed heavily.

When he visits her grave with van Helsing on the 27th he starts by talking about her emotionally then cutting off when he gets to her lips, and after that point doesn’t describe her corpse with humanizing language at all for the rest of that entry:

She was, if possible, more radiantly beautiful than ever; and I could not believe that she was dead. The lips were red, nay redder than before; and on the cheeks was a delicate bloom. […] “Are you convinced now?” said the Professor in response, and as he spoke he put over his hand, and in a way that made me shudder, pulled back the dead lips and showed the white teeth. “See,” he went on, “see, they are even sharper than before. With this and this"—and he touched one of the canine teeth and that below it—” […] He was looking intently at the face of the dead woman, raising the eyelids and looking at the eyes, and once more opening the lips and examining the teeth.

And by 29 September, after seeing her in action he speaks of her pretty firmly as a thing, at least until Arthur has finished staking her:

Then she turned, and her face was shown in the clear burst of moonlight and by the lamp, which had now no quiver from Van Helsing’s iron nerves. Never did I see such baffled malice on a face; and never, I trust, shall such ever be seen again by mortal eyes. The beautiful colour became livid, the eyes seemed to throw out sparks of hell-fire, the brows were wrinkled as though the folds of the flesh were the coils of Medusa’s snakes, and the lovely, blood-stained mouth grew to an open square, as in the passion masks of the Greeks and Japanese. If ever a face meant death—if looks could kill—we saw it at that moment. […] She seemed like a nightmare of Lucy as she lay there; the pointed teeth, the bloodstained, voluptuous mouth—which it made one shudder to see—the whole carnal and unspiritual appearance, seeming like a devilish mockery of Lucy’s sweet purity. […] The Thing in the coffin writhed; and a hideous, blood-curdling screech came from the opened red lips. The body shook and quivered and twisted in wild contortions; the sharp white teeth champed together till the lips were cut, and the mouth was smeared with a crimson foam. […] And then the writhing and quivering of the body became less, and the teeth seemed to champ, and the face to quiver. Finally it lay still. […] There, in the coffin lay no longer the foul Thing that we had so dreaded and grown to hate that the work of her destruction was yielded as a privilege to the one best entitled to it, but Lucy as we had seen her in her life, with her face of unequalled sweetness and purity.

Even if he doesn't realize what he's doing, it feels like it happens enough to say there's something there. Him sensing the change and not liking it, without realizing at first why.

[fuckingrealityshifting]

1// hi there, before you get too far, I want to say that I am trying to say this with all the kindness in my heart, and that I do, truly care for yall, and this is why im typing this now. I stumbled across your blog via your 'shifting terms' post, and I explored the idea of shifting and the shiftblr community a bit. I read all of your sources (although I don’t really believe most of them are credible enough) ((it could just be the uni student in me tho)) and I can't help but worry for you and

2// the shifting community. As I understand, most of you are still quite young, and while I haven’t tried to shift (I have a deep paranoia of developing a psychotic disorder), I fear that this practice could affect the young minds in this community in an unprecedented way. I am /not/ saying that any of you are delusional, im not saying its fake, im not saying i dont believe you. But many of you have mentioned how shifting is a) not dangerous and b) similar to astral projecting.

3// This is where I begin to worry, in my understanding, astral projecting is VERY dangerous, so if what you are doing is similar i dont believe it is a good idea. Especially for young people. Adolescent brains are very prone to mental illness, and I fear by placing yourselves in this situation you could eventually damage your mind. I dont mean to preach or anything, i just know a lot of you are young and i think you should be aware of the dangers of what you are doing,

4// because it could affect you in the long run. But stay safe, watch over each other and i wish yall the best. (ps. im sorry this was long)

/////end of ask

Okay so I just wanted to first say it would be okay if you didn’t believe or thought I was mentally ill and stated such! An ask like this is useful because it can start an actual conversation; I have concerns besides just disbelief to go off. Astral projection, being young, etc. I thank you for that and for leaving asks.

I don’t want people to think it’s not okay to be open about not believing. I know with the whole rating stuff rather than responding to comments it might seem like that, but I’m just going to brush off what doesn’t have a purpose other than bringing people down because there’s no point in repeating myself.

If it’s clearly meant to be sarcastic or has a punchline or comment for the sake of being rude or feeling like you’re superior (“get a hobby”) then I’m just not gonna humor you. I’m not intending to shut down all concerns at all.

About the sources—yeah, I do agree, a lot of the sources aren’t very credible, I totally acknowledge that. I also acknowledge even if they were all done by very credible sources the findings wouldn’t be absolutely decisive.

That’s kind of the fault of a lack of experimentation in scientific/professional spaces regarding anything spiritual and just the nature of spirituality itself. At the end of the day it’s mainly the suggestion of the findings that are important to spiritual people looking for evidence. I’m not sure if I worded that all coherently lol

I’m gonna answer these two points in reverse

Shifting is b.) similar to astral projection

So when I say similar to astral projection, I mean mainly in the fact you are perceiving stuff outside of your body and projecting. It’s a similar concept, and a bit of a similar practice, but not entirely.

With shifting, you are projecting your consciousness, and with astral projection, you are projecting your astral self/soul.

(I haven’t researched as much into the specifics of astral projection as I have for shifting so feel free to correct me! My understanding of astral projection is that your soul/astral self projects from your body to wander the astral realm.)

I’m gonna copy and paste some stuff I said in a dm message to someone who had a similar concern.

When a person shifts, their soul remains in their body. Your consciousness/awareness of reality is what is in another universe. When a person asteral projects, their soul leaves their body and can travel different realms of the universe.

When a person astral projects, they can come across spirits, deities, and harmful entities. They can take damage to the soul. They can change their astral form. Astral projection is dangerous. It is highly recommended not to astral project without protection.

When a person shifts, they are in a normal reality and do not need protection. Protection doesn’t hurt, as it doesn’t hurt to have protection in this reality, but its not necessary. (Precautions should always be taken.)

If they die in their desired reality, their soul is fine so they just come back. There is no danger of death. Your consciousness or alternate self (“clone”) can also go about your day while you are shifted which I have never heard about for astral projection.

The differences between your spirit projecting outside of your body and your consciousness projecting into another reality is why shifting is generally regarded as safer and as needing less precaution.

shifting is a. not dangerous

Well, not inherently. But like most anything it can be used dangerously. Some of the precautions that should be taken are:

•educating yourself properly before shifting

•grounding yourself (an ungrounded shifter can have issues)

•making sure you are not depending on shifting for anything or using it as unhealthy escapism

•understanding spirituality concepts even if you’re not practicing

I have a Staying Safe While Shifting post that has been in my drafts forever because I want to finish my mental health series to link it in the post, but I’ve been procrastinating finishing the mental health series because of the ADHD and shifting topic, which I believe I have.

We do have a majority of young people on the community—middle to older teens, I think. Most adults interested in this sort of thing participate under Quantum Jumping, a term that’s been around longer, which seems more online forum based.

Overall, yes. Shifting when exposed to the wrong people can absolutely harm mental health. I think we’re seeing it on TikTok. I just don’t have the power to make sure only people who can mentally take it see it. I just have to do my best to educate people on how reality shifting works so delusions or misunderstandings are hopefully easier to spot.

I absolutely thank you for the thoughtful message and if I brought up more concerns let me know.

[trashboatprince]

Another little one-shot for Ink Spots (posted up here cause its so short and not plot-heavy), this time it takes place after the previous one where Boris finds them, now showing Henry awake in the safehouse.

Summery: Bendy is happy to see that Henry is awake after that nasty fall, but he doesn’t like the fact that he sees another strange, ink-based mark on his creator.

Luckily, this one wasn’t from the studio, and it has an interesting story to go along with it.

Warning: mentions of drinking and drunkenness, mentions of war, Henry made some silly choices during his time in the service, headcanons and the like, you know the drill

I even included little illustrations for this, sketches actually, cause I draw for the main story. Also I wanted to show Henry’s tattoo.

On with the fic!

--

A Different Kind of Ink

Ink Spots one-shot

--

Bendy yawned loudly as he stretched out on the cot, rolling over to cling to Henry like he had done the last time he rested. Only he realized that there was no Henry with him. He gasped and sat up, looking around, seeing no sign of his human anywhere.

The door to the small room was opened, and he could hear water running down the hall, along with Henry’s voice. “I’ll wash these after mine dry. Thanks for lettin’ me borrow ‘em.” There was a bit of silence before Henry continued.

“Nah, it’s fine, you have a lot of extra clothes here. Were there more people here?”

“…”

“I see. Well, thanks, Boris. I’ll be done soon, just gotta make some attempt at the ink on my clothes, heh.”

Bendy blinked before stepping into the hall, seeing Boris happily walking back to the main room from the bathroom. The little demon approached the bathroom, peeking in to see Henry sitting on a chair at the sink, scrubbing away at his pants with a cleaning brush and a bar of soup. He was happy to see that the other was awake and moving around, he had been a bit out of it for a while since the hall, suffering from a fever from what Bendy could tell through Boris’ pantomiming.

He was coherent earlier but was still recovering from the back injuries he got. Bendy smiled as he watched Henry moving about with ease, seeming to not be bothered by any major pain and aches. From what Bendy could see, Henry was in a pair of boxer shorts and a tank top, allowing him to see the bandaged-up areas on the human. Though something caught the demon’s attention on Henry’s person.

On his upper left arm, near the start of his shoulder, was a black mark. From what Bendy could see, it was shaped like his head, like the inky mark on Henry’s right hand, only this one seemed to have his face instead of being a solid black. Oh… oh no! Did he have a second mark?! Did something happen after all that nonsense they went through the other day!?

He let out a small whimper, which seemed to catch Henry’s attention. “Oh, hey there, bud. Is somethin’ wrong?”

Bendy shifted on his feet before quietly approaching. He looked at the mark when he stopped by Henry’s side, examining it. It was clearly his face, signature grin, pie cut eye, though the left one was closed because the image was winking. There were even a few little stars around the image, and his bowtie was under his head.

“Henry, when did you get marked again?”

“Marked again?” Henry asked, raising an eyebrow, before he noticed what Bendy was looking at. “Oh! Heh, that’s not a mark!”

“B-But it looks like it’s made of ink! It’s gotta be from here!”

Henry laughed a little, shaking his head. “No, bud, that’s not from here. That’s from Belgium.”

Bendy blinked, confused. “Belgium? What do ya mean?”

The animator smiled as he picked Bendy up, setting him down on the counter as he returned to scrubbing at the ink on his pants. “Back in the early forties, there was a war going on and I got drafted. Well, a bit into my service, not too long before I got some nasty wounds that got me sent home early,” he gestured to a few scars on his leg and even lifted up his tank top a bit to show some on his side and stomach,

“I was stationed in Belgium, near the French boarder. My troop found a town to stay in for a bit alongside another troop, a French one, and we all went to a tavern that was open and still serving beer. A bunch of Americans findin’ a bar with beer? Heh, turned into one heck of a night for all of us and the French troop.”

The little demon watched, listening with interest as Henry continued. “Well, while I was there, I brought my sketchbook with me, finally getting the chance to just sit down and draw, ya know? Well, this one French solider sat down next to me, needing a break from his friends and some of mine, and he saw me drawin’ you.

“Turns out, he was a huge fan of the show, sayin’ he always went to the theater to catch the newest one. Let me tell you, the grin on that guy’s face when I told him I was your creator would rival yours, heh. His name is Maurice and we got to talkin’. Turns out he was an artist himself, he even ran a book store with his wife and brother, still does, I think. Anyway, he said he did tattoos as a side job, something he picked up from his father who use to do it himself.”

“Tattoo?” Bendy asked as Henry tapped his arm.

“This is a tattoo, it’s a drawin’ on your skin that’s made with a special kind of ink. A lot of people have them, often of special images and words. Sometimes… they’re not good things, but I won’t go into that. Anyway, well, when he said he did tattoos, my drunken brain thought, ‘hey Henry! You should get one’, and wow, did I not even give that a second thought.”

The imp snickered a little. “You picked to have a drawin’ of my beautiful mug, eh?”

“Well, I was really drunk and wanted somethin’ fun and hilarious, Maurice jokingly asked if I wanted you on my arm, and of course I said yes! He quickly made up a makeshift tool, turns out he had tattooed a few of his friends while on break from the battlefields a few times, and he got to work. I even let him pick out one of your sketches from my sketchbook to draw, and he picked this one.”

Henry smiled, looking a bit embarrassed. “Next mornin’, woke up hungover and found the tattoo. One of my friends who wasn’t hungover told me the story, and now I remember it after havin’ a cleared mind, but man was it embarrassin’ at first. Then it became a little symbol for the troop. We called ourselves the Smiling Demons, Maurice was nice enough to give a bunch of us little stars to match the ones around you. Cheesy, I know, but it was a nice gesture.”

He set the scrub down and looked at Bendy. “I’m actually still in contact with Maurice, ya know? We exchanged addressed and wrote to each other all the time, just updates on life and such. Sometimes we even would draw pictures for each other. A few years ago, me and Linda went and visited Paris, we ran into him and his wife and had a nice time.”

He chuckled a little as he sat back in the old chair. “Oh man, Linda was so furious with me when I told her about the tattoo, until she saw it. Then she just laughed, thought it was the funniest thing to ever happen to me. Oh, yeah, she was worried about my injuries and stuff, but that smilin’ face of yours cheered her up. We told this to Maurice and he looked so proud of his work, what a great guy, still a big fan of yours.”

Bendy smiled a little, kicking his feet as he leaned back on his hands. “Heh, nice to have friends, eh? Hey, whose Linda?”

“Oh, she’s my wife.”

“You’re married?! I didn’t know dat! Where’s yer ring?”

Henry dug into the pocket of his pants and pulled out a silver band. “I took it off on instinct when I came to the studio. I use to keep it off when I worked cause I always hated getting ink on it. I always felt bad about it getting messy when I came home, but Linda never seemed to mind, still, instinct made me pocket it. I’m surprised it survived all of that stuff we went through.”

Bendy nodded. “Say, when we get out, do ya think I’ll get to meet her?”

“Heh, of course you will. I’ll take us home and you’ll get to meet her, and hopefully the rest of my family. Gonna be hard to explain everythin’ that’s happened to us and how you came to me, and, well, hopefully our eyes will be returned to normal by then. Hm, she’s gonna be mad about me being home later than expected, and I doubt there’s a workin’ phone here…”

“Well, I bet she’ll understand when we tell her everythin’! Besides, ya got me as proof that crazy stuff happened!” Bendy grinned, looking excited now. “Golly, I can’t wait to get outta here, see da world, meet yer family, an’ spend time wit’cha without the chance of death bein’ around every corner!”

Henry looked at him, smiling a little. “Yeah, that’ll be nice. I’d like for you to see what’s beyond the studio, bet you’d like what we’ve got nowadays.”

“Tell me! Heck, tell me more about’cha, Henry! I wanna know all sorts of stuff about my favorite human.” Bendy happily yelled, if he had a tail, it would probably be wagging.

Blinking, Henry looked at him before laughing lightly. “Alright, let’s see… ah, when I was younger, I used to be a prankster and a troublemaker, like you…”

Boris peeked in on the two, having heard a lot of chitter chatter from the main room. He watched and listened to Henry as he talked to Bendy about his time at the studio when it first opened, seeming so happy to talk about the good stuff that had happened here. The wolf smiled, deciding to let them be, he was sure both of them needed a moment of peace together.

END

--

Just a little thing, I was thinking about the idea of my Henry having a tattoo of Bendy on his person, but I wasn’t sure what a good reason for it would be. Then I thought about this, and here we go!

That, and I almost, ALMOST wanted to give him something super ridiculous that he’d be embarrassed about cause I was re-reading my copy of Journal 3 and read about Ford’s tattoo. But I decided on Bendy being the design, a simple one, instead of something really silly.

Also, this fanfic was an excuse to establish a few things: Henry got hurt in the war but obviously lived, him and Linda are married (have been since 1930 in my au), and he already had ink in him before getting his mark. I also love the idea that Henry has friends from his army days (and most are still around, they remember Henry the artist, his nickname was Bendy as a joke)

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed!

[kaleidographia]

[Review] Tales of Vesperia: The Brightest Star in the Night Sky Doesn't Shine as Strongly as I'd Hoped

Warning: Contains allusive/thematic spoilers.

The day is finally here! Tales of Vesperia: Definitive Edition, containing content previously unseen outside of Japan, has finally been released, so that us English speakers and/or non-PS3 owners can experience the new storylines, characters and features for the first time! Alas, this isn’t a post about that, firstly because this post is going up day-of-release and I haven’t had a chance to play it yet, and secondly because I am writing this from outside of the country and won’t be united with my pre-ordered copy until I return next week, RIP.

Therefore, this post is written from the point of view of someone who has only played the Xbox 360 version. I will try to keep it brief for the sake of not spoiling newcomers to the game, and also hopefully not to complain about things that are fixed (or broken??) in the Definitive Edition.

Tales of Vesperia is a game in the long-running “Tales of” franchise from Bandai Namco, the first one in HD, originally released for the Xbox 360 in 2008, later receiving an updated PS3 version in 2009, exclusive to Japan. Like many older fans, my introduction to the Tales of series was with Tales of Symphonia for the Gamecube, and I fell in love hard; I was therefore extremely excited to play the next games, but unfortunately, I never owned the platforms for them until very recently. Along with Tales of the Abyss, Vesperia and Symphonia form the “holy trinity” of games in the series almost everyone loves; find a Tales fan and ask them their favourite game, and the answer will likely be one of those three (note: I’ve heard very good things about Graces and the two Xillia games, but unfortunately haven’t had a chance to judge them firsthand myself). The three games, while not directly related in terms of plot or setting, share a lot of things in common, as they had mostly the same creative team, often referred to as “Team Symphonia” (as opposed to “Team Destiny” which made most other games since then). One notable difference is the scenario writer, Takashi Hasegawa, while Symphonia and Abyss were written by Takumi Miyajima.

The Tales series is known for its reliance on anime and JRPG tropes, often used in a way that plays off cliché expectations only to then layer plot twists and character development and produce a much deeper experience than what would be expected from the get-go. When used effectively, these methods produce a story that is both fun and emotionally challenging. Tales of Vesperia is no different, offering a cast of archetypes that should be highly recognizable to those familiar with the genre, and yet this may be best set of characters in a Tales game. The party has impressively good banter, chemistry and dynamics and several scenes had me laughing out loud or yelling, and I never had a bad time watching their relationships unfold.

Unfortunately, the game spares little time fleshing out backstories or learning more about each individual character outside of the main plot. By the end, I was left wanting, as the cast was so endearing and vibrant, yet I knew next to nothing about them aside from what had been relevant to show onscreen. I longed for more information about where they had come from and how they had gotten where they were, but it is a testament to the strength of the character writing that their storylines reached a satisfying conclusion despite this relative sparse amount of information about them. “Backstory is not story”, Craig McCracken and Frank Angones were fond of saying to fans of Wander Over Yonder, but for a game with the size and scope of a 60-hour JRPG, not providing that window of information feels like a hole in the worldbuilding.

Mechanically, Vesperia builds on the model established by Symphonia and refined in Abyss, where combat takes place in a 3D arena and the player can run around, hit enemies and rack up combos fighting game style (the franchise calls this “Linear Motion Battle System”). While Symphonia was in 3D, it restricted the player to a single side-to-side corridor of action. Abyss added the ability to run around in 3D space by holding down a button, a feature Vesperia also has. This makes combat easier and more fun, as nothing is quite as satisfying as avoiding an attack and then running around and hitting the enemy from behind. And, as the game allows up to four players controlling different party members, and I have a player 2 (shoutout to my roommate Opal), Vesperia’s system is the most well-suited to multiplayer. If nothing else, I never felt lost while on the battlefield yelling for backup. The one major flaw is that boss fights come with massive difficulty spikes and I often had to grind and formulate careful battle plans with Opal just to not get continuously massacred by bosses.

Storywise, Vesperia starts off very strongly, sort of peters out near the middle, and then the third act falls apart. At first the theme is anti-authority, with a protagonist who grew up in the slums, neglected by nobles, who became a knight and then quit out of disillusionment when it turned out all they did was squabble about politics, and the inciting incident and early driver of the plot is his quest to “fix the plumbing” as a popular Tumblr text post put it. It’s clear Yuri has all the reason in the world to not trust authority and he even goes full vigilante against unjust abuse of power, but while this thread seems like the most important theme in the story, after a while so many other elements come into play it ends up lost and doesn’t really make much of an appearance except to highlight the differences between Yuri and Flynn’s approaches to life and how they prefer to help people. On its own it’s a compelling idea, but it never gets the follow-through it deserves, and my expectations were certainly subverted—but in a bad way.

It’s hard to talk about the third act without spoilers so I will probably come back to it for a proper analysis at a later date, but its ultimate message was already kind of limp in 2008 and is even more laughable now. For a game whose initial premise was so strongly against authority, the ultimate resolution of the main conflict reads as incredibly daft in light of just about everything that is happening in politics at the moment. There’s a very strong environmental allegory and the comparisons to climate change are not subtle, but the writers probably bit off more than they could chew because realistically trying to solve this problem in the time the story allotted would have been next to impossible; I still would have hoped the implications of the given solution had been actually explored instead of settling for an “oh well, guess everything’s been fixed now”.

I’m being harsh about the plot because to me Vesperia has a lot of wasted potential. Don’t get me wrong: I do love this game. It is in fact up there with the holy trinity as far as my opinions of the series go, but it lands in third place out of the three because it just fails to live up to what its first half promises about the world it created. To put it bluntly, if the story had just ended at the conclusion of the second act, it would have been much stronger. That the game continues for another 20 hours on a completely different track with an unsatisfying, unrealistic conclusion is a huge shame because it brings down what could have been a real masterpiece of tropey anime JRPG narratives. I live for that stuff, there’s a reason I want to play every Tales game, but that’s what makes this letdown the most disappointing. At least the characters themselves get good conclusions; it is unfortunate I can’t say the same for the main plot.

Despite all this I think Vesperia is a worthwhile experience, and one of my favourite things about is its aesthetic sense. Every location is immersive, polished, and the pinnacle of what I want to see in a videogame, to the point I dream of Symphonia and Abyss remakes made in the same style (and every other game in the series, to be honest, but that seems unlikely with the direction it’s taken since then). I genuinely cared about the party and I wanted to see them succeed and I was ultimately happy that they did even if I did roll my eyes a lot. The combat was so satisfying and so fun to play with a player 2 it makes me twice as mad that Zestiria’s camera goes completely wild during multiplayer and prevents me from joining in. I should note that for someone who plays as many games as I do I am notoriously terrible at them so I heavily favour story over mechanics, but Vesperia is a game that reminds me that engaging gameplay can make a huge difference. Yeah, I suck, but at least I’m having fun while sucking. That’s more than I can say for a lot of games.

If you like JRPGs, games that let you run around and hit things, or fun and intriguing character dynamics, you’ll probably like Tales of Vesperia. If you’re looking for a coherent story from start to finish, you’ll probably disappointed, but there’s just enough there to keep you engrossed until the end. Overall, Vesperia is solid, and the parts it fumbles aren’t bad enough to ruin the whole thing, but hopefully the extra content in Definitive Edition helps to smooth it out; I’ll have to find that out for myself.

Aside from how it messes up the voice acting this time around. Oh, Bamco.

[hollow-transient]

Are there any writing blogs that you follow? Is there any advice you would give to budding writers? asking for a friend

Not really, at least if I do I don’t really go through them like I probably should. I think I have a tag that is “reference” and some of those reblogged posts are for writing.

As for advice, oh geez I’m not sure I’m all too qualified, I myself am not really any more experienced than a budding writer, I’ve technically not ACTUALLY written anything in a long while. I’ll probably sound like a hypocrite. I do have some tips I’ve picked up along the way that I could share though, I guess, I just hope I can explain them properly and that they are useful and “correct” advice. I’m open for criticism, I don’t want to mislead anybody:

I say as I type out all this junk. Hopefully something of use is in here.

1. Consume media, obviously. A good way to help you get your ideas out there is seeing all the kinds of ways other people do the same, of course do more than just look. Analyze it, try to see why they do things a certain way or how they do so. Get a hang at what is expected from specific genres or mediums and how people deliver their ideas to their audience. Because this is essentially what writing (and art) is, a creator trying to deliver some kind of feeling to somebody else. (Or maybe I’m full of it, who knows)

This will also help you with learning proper grammar and formatting techniques, and I don’t mean just “proper spelling” because sometimes you need bad spelling to get a point across. Its important because goddamn, there is a huge difference between a writer who knows how to write a character in the way that character would talk in that specific situation as if it was really happening, and a writer who is only writing dialogue between two characters that they created. Also, knowing language structure is good as it lets you write what you want properly. A part in a story used to bring out suspense is written in a specific way that is different than a part that is used to bring out calmness. All this knowledge can seem basic but its useful. Basically, a creator needs to be aware of all the elements they are instilling into their creation.

2. Its alright to get inspiration from other people. I think a lot of early writers suffer from hesitation because they think “I don’t want to seem like I’m copying somebody else” or “I don’t think I’m creative enough.” Literally (nearly) every story ever written has been some kind of “copy” of another story, almost every idea thats ever existed has been talked about by somebody else. Whats important is the way YOU write it out, because THAT is the unique part of a story and what people will be coming to you for, what you need to do is get them to want YOUR perspective on pre-established ideas and to see YOUR words. Basically, don’t stress out over it too much, just get to writing it out and developing your own ideas. Also side-note, don’t be afraid to try and throw out “some wild and weird idea” out there. Don’t be afraid to experiment with new things, I guarantee* you that you’ll find an audience that appreciates its and probably always wanted to read a story that had your new “wild and weird idea”. *Note: I guarantee nothing

3. HOWEVER, that doesn’t mean you should just flat out try to copy somebody else in the hopes that it will make your story better. Its easy to get the idea of using somebody’s format for your own story, but if you do it like that you really will just seem like a copycat. Its good for fanficiton however, I guess. Maybe. Just write in a way you would want to read and don’t stress over following “popular writer’s” or “my favorite writer’s” formats and using all their techniques, although it can be a helpful starting point and a useful crutch.

Likewise, don’t be afraid of using tropes if you get stuck with something, because once again the importance is not on the idea/story itself that you are trying to get across, but your own style and feelings that you are advertising. (However, from an editor’s standpoint, its also useful to write in accordance to your audience. You can write a story for yourself, for your audience, or for both. Usually both is best, as it keeps you interested and invites others to actually enjoy your work. An example is the common Shounen trope of the escalating threat/power levels, its a technique shared amongst mangakas because its useful in keeping audiences interested and progressing a story, but it can also backfire for some when it goes on for too long and becomes the main focus.)

4. Make interesting characters. Doesn’t matter how convoluted, unique, entertaining, or CRRRAAAZY you think your premise/plot is. Its certainly important, but if your characters are absolutely shit nobody is going to want to read your story because they won’t care about the characters (who are essentially the messengers/representatives for your story in the first place) or whatever happens to them. I cannot stress how important this is. Its alright if they start out “basic” but they will need to develop into something else, and try not to start off with too many.

5. The real world is ripe with inspiration. If you ever run out, look around you and think about your own experiences. Don’t be afraid to use them for ideas. Even if you don’t think you have had any interesting ones and have led a boring life, you aren’t the only one (hey-o pal-o), there is always something of use around you that can bring you ideas. Don’t be afraid to exaggerate events, as long as it makes sense (depending on what you’re writing even this might not be important), I mean it is fiction, after all. (unless you aren’t writing fiction, then good luck with that. Try writing other people’s experiences?)

6. GET AN “EDITOR” OR GET GOOD AT EDITING. Having a second opinion/somebody else who isn’t as connected to an idea as you is great for actually writing things coherently. They can let you know when something seems a little off that you might not have intended to sound off, or when your writing accidentally gives off the wrong idea/feeling, or they can just help you proofread. If you are a lonely, do not worry, you can do these things yourself as well. You just need to get good at perceiving your own work from an “outsider’s perspective” or from how you think your audience will be reading it.

Lucky number 7. Don’t give up. Write down all the ideas you have. Keep writing. Take breaks, but don’t stop. Learn to eventually share your writings, and not just keep them to yourself forever.

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY

Have fun?!

But no seriously, make sure you actually enjoy what you are doing. Its important to actually like writing if you are going to write, otherwise whats the point? If what you are writing is stressing you out and nothing is coming to mind, take a break and mull things over. If you have to write under a deadline, don’t be afraid to just write something down quickly, just be sure to edit it later before you actually turn it in. Then again what do I know, I’m not much of a writer myself! Feel free to disregard everything I’ve said.

BUT WAIT Also here is a link to some advice that a creator whose writing style I enjoy a lot posted, she says a lot more important things than I do in less words, http://lolitahartlessstuff.tumblr.com/post/150457696559/any-advice-for-future-writers

She also has great advice for other things if you search for “advice” on her blog, like for writing/creating VNs or random life-advice her anons ask her for some reason. Alternatively, you can search on there for “e-celebs” and do some self-study on how not to be a horrible and/or embarrassing person on the internet.

[gaildaley]

I started this year in Review in December of 2015 because that’s when I think the year really began.

Dec 27, 2015

Wow! Its only four days until another year begins. I’ve made a lot of changes this year. I began writing novels again and wonder of wonders, I’ve actually finished book one of the Handfasting Trilogy, A Year And A Day, and I’ve began on book two Forever And A Day. This story is about three sisters who live on a planet called Vensoog and the choices they make to help their colony survive the aftermath of a galaxy wide war.

February 8, 2016

This was a good week to get some work done. I am more than halfway through Forever And A Day, the second book in my Handfasting trilogy and I have covers done for both of the first two books. Rather than painting a cover in acrylics, I decided to go with some digital artwork so that I could make them very similar.  I think I will go ahead and use Amazons PDK system. It will mean that I can’t put my book up anywhere but Amazon, but its price is excellent—free. And I really don’t have money to pay a regular e-book publisher. My son’s book at Outskirts Press cost almost $2,000. He did get a lot for it, hard copies of his book and it’s marketed in I-Books and Nook as well as Kindle, but sometimes you have to cut your coat to suit your cloth.

I also got my two latest Acrylic paintings done, Cat Napping and Street Vendor and framed. I think I will put at least one of them in ACA’s membership show. Of course entering one of their shows is always problematic, as many times the judges they select don’t seem to care for my art. I used to worry about that, but not anymore.  Having seen some of the art ACA’s judges deemed worthy in the past, I killed any feelings of inferiority I used to have art wise.

Now that I have my enlargements back from the printer, I can also start on the three longhorn paintings I intend to do for the Old West Art show in April.

February 28, 2016

Well, so much for good intentions. I DID manage to get the three paintings started. Unfortunately, I also started a bladder infection; my husband came down with the flu (which he shared) so I haven’t done anything else yet. The medicine the doctor gave me for the infection has caused an almost constant migraine and nausea. Hopefully, however, March will be a better month. Here are three canvases.

March 13, 2016

For the last three weeks, I have had three unfinished paintings for the old west show sitting there glaring at me from my art table. Not really my fault I haven’t been able to work on them: I developed a bladder infection for which I went to the doctor, had a bad reaction to the meds he proscribed, and then I came down with Vernon’s flu he brought home from the Pool Workshops. This Thursday, I was finally able to start on Home on the Range and I got part of it blocked in. Unfortunately, after I sat there and looked at it for a while, I decided that I needed to get rid of the clay cliffs I was using as a background because they were competing with what I intended to be the focus — the Longhorn cattle resting in an almost dry river bed. I painted over my entire mornings work on the cliffs with grey and then had to let it sit long enough for me to be able to work it. I confess I really don’t understand why other artists complain about how fast acrylics dry because at some point in a painting, I will have to stop and let it sit so it will be dry enough not to make mud! I substituted some rolling hills for the cliffs with all those dark, cracked clay lines, which looks better, but I still need to cool off the background hills so that I can push them back or maybe I will add a structure or a tree line; I haven’t decided yet. I will be using pieces of the same dry streambed in all three of the paintings. I have one more day to work on it before I have to stop and do Vern’s invoices for this month.

March 22, 2016

Today I finally managed to start on Chilsolm Trail. I got most of the background done and the horses and men drawn up with white pencil. The background took more time than I thought it would, especially the riverbank.

March 23, 2016

Today I was hoping to get all the cows and the cowboy blocked in, but all those horns and legs took a lot more time than I expected. I finally left one of the cows un-blocked and worked on the horse and rider. I used ultramarine blue and powder blue underpainting on the horse. I will go in tomorrow and finish it off with black.

  March 24, 2016

Well today, I feel as if I am finally making progress; I do still have quite a bit to do to finish this one though. I think adding a second cowboy and more cows was the right thing to do. Five cows just didn’t look like a trail herd! Tomorrow I am taking a break to do housework, but hopefully by Monday I will be able to go in and finish off the foreground. Then I get to start on the 3rd one—The Bozeman Trail!

March 26, 2016

Saturday morning and I still have to finish off my household chores. Put up the laundry washed yesterday and do the dishes so I will have a clean sink to rinse out my paint brushes. (I say I’m only doing them every other day to conserve water, but the truth is I loathe housework). I’m pretty satisfied with the way Chilsolm Trail is coming along. For Monday I will need to finish off the foreground grass and then put in some shadows and highlights to identify which direction the sun is coming from. Details…

Tuesday March 27, 2016

Well Monday turned out to be a wash. It’s wonderful how other people seem to fill up your day without asking you first… Oh, well. Today I got the foreground grass done on the Chilsolm Trail done, and the background and drawing done on the Bozeman trail. I also got the backing prepared for four paintings. I use contact paper for backing and I reinforce the edges with clear strapping tape and use thumbtacks and Gorilla wood glue on the edges to fasten it down. This is easier to clean than plain brown paper, which seems to absorb dust. No surprise that the back of a painting gets just as dirty over time as the front!

The Proof copy of my first book in the Handfasting series came today, so I will be spending the next few days going over the proof for errors. I am a speed-reader so it should only take me about nine hours. I’m very pleased with the front cover design. The image I designed looks great.

Saturday, Vernon is going to be gone with some friends to the desert so I will have that day free to paint. He is actually very supportive, but the more people in the house when I am trying to work the more interruptions there seems to be…

April 12, 2016

I spent the weekend at the Columbia Inn (wonderful atmosphere, and they use real art bought locally in their room designs!) with my husband. It rained non-stop but that did not stop him and other members of CVP from enjoying panning the dirt brought in for them. They did this in the parking lot under pop-ups so that shows how dedicated they are to their notion of fun! We had a community dinner inside the 49er Mining Supply shop and Rob and Cheryl were wonderful hosts. Vernon has commissioned me to do a painting of the Inn and shop so I will be working on that later this year.

A Year And A Day, has been published on Amazon and Kindle and in May I will be making the rounds to advertise it. FYI, if you plan to use Amazon’s free publishing services; start with the printed edition on Create Space. I started with the e-book and ended up with two e-books (different covers but same book). In order to make the covers match, I took the first one I made off-line. Unfortunately, I had set up a pre-order on it, so Amazon has forbidden me to do any pre-orders for a year. Live and learn.

April 21, 2016

Well, the show and reception for Clovis Art Guild’s Old West & Rodeo show came off okay, despite the low amount of entries. I didn’t win anything this time, but that’s the breaks. The show comes down on Sunday. The next two weeks promise to be full also. Monday through Wednesday, I will need to get back to writing on my book and hopefully start my Safe Harbor painting. Andrew will be working with his Dad on Monday, so that will be the best day to paint. I also need to do some housekeeping on some of my POD sites (FAA, Pixels, and Red Bubble). Thursday, I need to change out my art at the Water Tower Gallery, and on Friday I take down my art from the Sunnyside Library Gallery (I also need to prepare a summer schedule for the library), then Saturday I plan to put up a couple of paintings in the Alliance of California’s membership display for the next two months.

I actually sold one of my hand painted keepsake boxes I have down at the Water Tower (Yaay!) So I suppose that this summer, I need to prepare some more for Christmas and Easter, which means developing some designs. Flower designs work well here as I am hopefully marketing these to women or to men buying for women! I ordered some Acrylic paint pens from Amazon and I plan to use them for the actual design after I paint the boxes. (Target date to do these is in June so they will be ready.)

June 10, 2016

Wow. Has it really been two months since I posted anything? Time flies I guess. I won’t say it has all been fun, but it has been productive. Sadly, I did not win anything at the Old West Show, but all the art was wonderful this year even though it was a smaller show.

I have finished two large seascapes and started my entry for the Miniature works show.

Forever And A Day is done and going through the editing process (this means I print it down at the local printer and go over it for errors. Fun). All Our Tomorrows is about halfway through the first draft. Because there are so many characters involved by now and the story moves from one group to another to remain coherent, I have to bounce back and forth between where the character focus is. I wish I could find another way to tell this so that won’t happen, but so far no dice.

Facebook kept rejecting my ad for A Year And A Day, so I ran it as a regular post and they blocked me out for ‘suspected illegal activity’ for two days…Big pain in the A to get back on. They won’t help you when you need it, but they sure do punish users who try to get around their system…

June 23, 2016

I’m trying to do better at posting to this journal. I just finished Vernon’s invoices for June, so I have had time to edit Forever and A Day three times, and I am starting on the fourth just as soon as I pick it up from the printer. I am in the process of writing All Our Tomorrows that I have already revised twice and it isn’t even finished yet! And I sold a copy of A Year And A day in April, for which Kindle will pay me around the end of June. That tells me if my ad campaign bears fruit in June, I won’t see money from sales until around the End of September.

My only entry I painted this year for the Miniature show is almost finished as I got to work on it today. Right now, it’s sitting on a little easel waiting for me to decide if I’m finished with it. It’s a night scene and those are always a struggle to split the difference between accurately showing that it’s at night and still making the paintings features visible…

August 7, 2016

Wow. I have gone an entire month without actually creating art. Well, not true really; I did five color studies for my Vensoog Handfasting series. I started to do a landscape of it also, but I ended up tossing it out (a rarity for me but it was just awful.) I actually have 4 small paintings drawn up (one 8×10 and two 5x7s). I also have two of my hand painted keepsake boxes started. They only need the painting done on the lids and then put together but there they sit…

Next week won’t be productive art-wise either tho’ because I will be starting on our Income tax. Ick. Migraine coming as always…

October 1, 2016

Wow! I’ve had a really busy summer! I have been working non-stop on getting the second book in my Handfasting Series published, and on top of that Clovis Art Guild had an art show and the Guild had to make arrangements to shuffle things around (our meetings, getting our 501(c) submitted to the IRS, etc.), so I confess I have neglected to write here in this journal. I went to a professional cover designer at fiverr.com to re-design the covers for my books and I am really pleased with how they turned out. I also finished the 2nd draft of the book “All our Tomorrows”. It’s currently being beta read by my son Andrew and a couple of good friends. My hand painted keepsake boxes are selling really well at the Watertower Gallery in Downtown Fresno, so I have also been busy making six more of those (actually a pretty time-consuming project). I start with a raw wooden box that I get from a local craft store, seal it, and then paint the base coat on the bottom and the lid. Then I draw a design on the lid and paint that. Then a varnish coat to protect the box is put on the outside and felt lining is added to the inside bottom and lid. Then I put the jewelry back on (hinges and clasps) and finally it is ready to take to the Gallery!  So I have been a busy girl. I also have six smaller paintings prepped (undercoat done and the image drawn up). I hope to have at least one of them ready by Christmas.

I had Pismo Beach critiqued by Master Artist Dennis Lewis at the Clovis Art Guild meeting last night. He confirmed what I was afraid of—those dratted cliffs in the back are still too bright. Considering how many times I repainted them trying to soften them, doing it over again is no big deal, but I wonder if I should also darken up the front. He also had some other suggestions for improving it, so since I have a month before the Fall Open where I intended to enter it, I will probably re work it.  Of course, that does mean re varnishing, but what the heck. I think I will re-wash the back with several layers of light grey and add some yellow to raw sienna for the sand front of the beach.

I also need to get in touch with my friends Betsy and Ron who volunteered to Beta read All Our Tomorrows for me and find out what suggestions they had. Andrew already made several, which I have implemented. It does make the book longer as he said I had rushed through several climaxes and through the chapter on the festival so I have added several pages there that involved re-ordering how the chapters were presented. I admit it does make the book seem less choppy. Beta Readers are a blessing… And just think, I haven’t started the editing for format errors yet! Still hope to get it into publication by Christmas…

December 7, 2016

Well, I did it again—missed an entire month of writing on this. In my defense, I should say that during this month, we adopted a new kitten. She was all alone out at one of Vernon’s commercial accounts. The manager had been feeding her but only twice a day, and a cat or puppy that young needs to be fed at least four times a day. We think Mab’s mother must have been killed and she couldn’t come back for her kittens. We never found the others, and it’s my opinion that Mab survived as long as she did because she is one stubborn feisty cat.

We also put on an art show at the Art Hub. Going to be taking it down later today. Yes, I know it’s raining, but sometimes you have to do what you can do.

All Our Tomorrows will be going to print in about 3 weeks. Yay!

I was hoping to get back into my regular artwork, but I caught a sore throat and it has turned nasty. (Can’t get the flu shot until after this clears up. Ick!)

December 15, 2016

Writing my 4th book in the Handfasting series. It’s a Cozy mystery set on Vensoog. Using Jayla (Gideon’s niece from Forever And A Day) as my heroine and Luc’s best friend Jake (All Our Tomorrows) as the hero. The story centers around the theft of the royal family’s Crown Jewels on planet Aphrodite. The thieves escape to Vensoog to try to fence them. There is a planet wide festival on Vensoog that draws interplanetary traffic so it makes good cover. The fence (Lipski) is killed and the jewels disappear. Jayla innocently buys the Lipski’s shop and then finds her body on the beach while she is out jogging.

I have got local, Royal and interplanetary cops who are suspicious of Jayla’s involvement. I have the original thieves, and the local mob who want to find the jewels.  A housekeeper robot who was programmed by the original owner as a gigolo and a sales bot who likes to run around naked (haven’t quite decided exactly what I’m going to do with them yet-maybe just comic relief).  Then there is Jayla’s nosy, interfering family, and her bossy boyfriend Jake who all trying to help her clear her name and getting in each other’s way.

Note to self: I think I have a form of writers block. I have to decide which of these plot lines to use as the main one, which ones are going to be red herrings and which ones are secondary. My problem is I like all of them so I haven’t written a thing on it that hasn’t felt forced for at least a week.

  A Year In Review I started this year in Review in December of 2015 because that’s when I think the year really began.